It is a very unique and thought-provoking opportunity that I have to be on rotation at a state mental hospital. It is has caused me to reflect a lot on the worth of souls. As I research and present patient cases as part of my assignments, I get to know these patients and all of the most personal things there are to know about a person and where they came from. It is eye opening, to say the least. You hope that they are not capable of such things and yet the reality is that they are for many different reasons. There are patients who have been dealing with mental illness for decades, who have been in this and other hospitals for decades. There are even some who will never leave of their own free will because their life is better there than it would be anywhere else. There is an eery stigma that is associated with state mental hospitals and a fascination for what unusual things have occured on their grounds over the years. There is an uneasy feeling as you pass through the halls, locking every door behind you. HOWEVER, what I have come to realize is that each of these patients is a person with inherent good in them. Do they sometimes behave in a way that is less than appropriate and at times even out of control? Yes. Do they have reason to? Maybe. Do they deserve a life locked up with limited freedom? I don't know. Do they deserve to feel like their life is better in a state mental hospital than in the community? No. Along with evaluating each of them and their drug regimens, we also go onto the floors and meet some of them and we attend some medication group sessions to help educate them on their medications. This all in an effort to help them help themselves improve and overcome according to their ability. Are these people dumb? Absolutely not! In fact, one lady was the valedictorian of her high school class and if you ask her what is the side effect of her medication, clozapine, she will respond that it can decrease white blood cells. Another young lady spoke with eloquance and used a larger vocabulary than myself as she talked about some issues with her medications. A gentlemen talked about his success with smoking cessation and looked to the future with hope and gratitude for his progress. Finally the event that has given me the most thought occured a few days ago as I was leaving the building to get in my car and drive home. A middle-aged woman who we had seen, and met for the first time, a week previous in our group session was outside of the building smoking. As I walked by she said, "Hey, are you from the pharmacy?" I replied that yes I was from the pharmacy. She then said to me, "It's Michael, right?" Shocked and somewhat freaked out I confirmed that that was my name. She reminded me of her name as I clearly did not know it. Ever since that event, my view on this experience has completely changed. I have since seen her on multiple occasions and every one she goes out of her way to look at me and greet me by using my name. She has a heart and she has a soul that is worth a lot! Despite her disability and her set-backs she still deserves love, respect, freedom and concern. She is just as important as me and just as important as everyone else no matter the situation. It is so hard for me to sit in a professional setting and give a presentation on how to help these patients when it is okay to make a mockery of their life and the cards that they have been dealt. It is disrespectful and really quite sad that people find the need to joke about abuse, molestation, violence, attempts at suicide, delusions, paranoia, hallucinations and other unfortunate behaviors. What could possibly be funny about these events? Are they funny in your life? NO! So why is it funny when it is someone else's life? Whatever you call them: crazies, psychos, mentally ill, freaks; it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter how you classify them or how they are placed according to society. They are still human beings. I feel that there is definately a goodness in each of them. If one of them can touch my life by remembering my name a week after first meeting me then her life is worth a lot to me.
